the aftermath

the argument exploded into something totally out of proportions. i was trying to tell him on the phone that i was upset at being taken for granted, and that he does not show much appreciation for the things that i do. the least he can do is to reciprocate some of the things that i do!

i was feeling a bit low and depressed at being treated this way, and on the phone, i cited a few examples to justify what made me feel that way. the examples include him staying over at my place and leaving first thing in the morning, about him not offering to share cost burden when at my place, and about me not receiving any little gifts after months of knowing him.

my requests were simple and not at all demanding. i just wish he can hang around for a bit on sunday mornings instead of rushing off. it will also be nice if he offers to pay for certain things that we do together instead of me purchasing all the things. and it will be very sweet if he reciprocates with small little gifts as nice gestures.

unfortunately, as always, my words were misinterpreted. he thought that i was being nasty and trying to attack him. maybe my delivery method was a bit harsh, but i just wanted him to realise what he was doing. it's not as if i am making up stories to stab at him. they are all facts! instead of apologising and saying that he will try to do better, which will quickly defuse the situation, it ended up in a shouting match...

it resulted in him avoiding me for 3 days. i asked why he was ignoring me, and he said he was not, which got me dumbfounded. if that was not considered ignoring me, then what was it? i was really really upset during that 3 days. i could not even go about doing my daily routine. it felt as if time had stopped. did i really deserve such a treatment after i had said something which i felt i was being mistreated, but had somehow annoyed him? by not hearing from him, i feared that something could have happened to him and i wondered if he was in hospital. his attitude gave me a mental breakdown.

i feel that things can only move forward and things resolved if there is communication. when the communication channels are blocked, nothing can proceed. instead, the situation will only get more inflamed and result in bigger resentments.